the unforeseen ill effects of backbiting

backbiting is bad.

the bible says so.

But really, WHY is it so bad?

Let me explain.

I have an inlaw that I really can’t get along with.

I tried to figure out WHY. But I couldn’t.

Then I developed a suspicion/theory. Its because my sister backbites me to him. Viciously.

I know she does. There are brief, glinting moments in our conversations that we have together that say “We’ve made fun of you for this.”

You know what I’m talking about. Like when the fact that you buy boxes and boxes of cookies and stockpile them in the cupboards was made fun of, pretty savagely. You can tell because if you bring it up and offer them from the stockpiles, they freeze and get this guilty look on their faces.

Or your clothes. Or your room. Or your very personal things that you know they discuss and ridicule.

This is why I like to have my private life.. private. So it isn’t open for ridicule.

But anyway, the parts that are, they take opportunity to make fun of me for it. Viciously. I know because of the way they make fun of other people, how the do it.

Two things.

• You know that people who make fun of others to you will make fun of you to others.
• And people who tell secrets of others to you will tell your secrets to others.

Anyway, HE DOES NOT RESPECT ME. He cannot respect me. Because my stupid sister herself ridicules me. She does it because she is nasty inside. I know she is. She is very mean.

So, that’s why we can’t get along. He’s spent so much time ridiculing me, that when he tries to sit down with me and speak, its pretty much unbearable.

interpersonal impedence

Interpersonal impedence

Refers to the sense of difficulty one feels when trying to get along with another.

Two people that get along perfectly are said to have a low interpersonal impedence. My sister and I can sit in the same room and within minutes be laughing and making jokes that we both find funny.

My inlaw and I, however, have a very high interpersonal impedence. His jokes don’t seem funny to me, and vice versa.

High interpersonal impedence: no matter how hard we try to spend time together, we just can’t get along.